Your Family's Path

Because of God’s tender mercy,
    the morning light from heaven is about to break upon us,
  to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death,
    and to guide us to the path of peace.  Luke 1:78-79

I love that this passage is a part of a prophecy a dad speaks concerning his son. The Spirit came upon Zechariah. Simple as that. I believe we could all be prophesying over our children if we seek the Spirit of Almighty God. Zechariah's son, John the Baptist, was a world changer. His dad saw it and spoke it...outloud...in front of all his neighbors. 

I've been going back to this passage for the past 6 months. Our family has kind of adopted this as our mission for our Pop Scripture Songs project.  As we meditate on this, we see that God is blessing our efforts to play and sing together to make this music. He is giving us great organizations to partner with to shine His light. And all of this is carrying us down a path of peace.

The path of peace is what I find intriguing.  How do you discover your path? What will bring your family peace?  I believe the path of peace is trod by obedience, by compassion, by love. God's specific path for each of us may be different. But our starting line is the same: HOME. Home is where we learn to obey, to love, to value others. So my challenge to you is to really love and serve the people you live with. Children who love their siblings will love others. Children who encourage each other will grow to be adults who lift up those who hurt.  Young adults who have felt compassion for their little brothers and sisters will step out of your door and into this world with an empathetic heart.  We have to teach our kids unselfishness. The world is not going to do it. So the next time you have to stop what you are doing to correct a child, to wipe up a spill, to sooth hurt feelings, think of it this way: you are clearing a path. Your example marks the path that your children will walk.

Write to Your Children

 I love a good one liner. They are easy for me. I love Instagram and Twitter. But they fool me into thinking I am keeping a record of the best moments of my life. Often I need to be reminded to write on paper...with a pen...something that will last.  

My dear friend, Lisa, saw something silly I tweeted this week and reminded me of Isaiah 30:8
Now go and write down these words.
    Write them in a book.
They will stand until the end of time
    as a witness. 

 I keep a different journal for each of my kids where I write down funny things they do, amazing things I see in each of them and just how much I love them. I hope these will be something they treasure one day. I want them to read their book and remember how God's hand has been on them since birth. They are each so different, so unique. I want them to know that I paid attention to the little things, the special things.

On Time and Distraction

Urgent things pile up against the imaginary door in my mind. They disguise themselves as important in an attempt to fool me into letting them in.  If I crack the door just to humor them, they flood the creative dam I’ve constructed to protect my time.  Soon I find that I am wading in distraction, checking off a busy to-do-list, not the agenda of my heart.  My heart calls over the rushing waters of busyness, entreating me not to be swept up in the current.  

I want to do something every day worth writing in my journal.  A small act can have an enduring effect.  Reading a book to my boy when he looks lonely or bored.  Going for a walk with a daughter who needs a break from schoolwork.  Pausing as I rush from one task to the next because I hear in the tone of my teen’s voice that he wants to talk.

Put down what’s in your hand and look them in the eye, my soul tells me. But all the shoulds and musts are vying for my attention, telling me things won’t get done if I don’t do them.  Diversion tries to manipulate me, to steal from me. It grows strength and confronts me, argues that I don’t have enough time. If I will only focus my eyes on the path ahead, priorities float to the top and distractions evaporate. Truth sings out what I know in my heart: I have plenty of time. It’s wisdom I lack. I don’t need more time. I need to use my time more wisely.

Simple Homeschool

Telling you what a typical day looks like puts me in a vulnerable position.  I am tempted instead to tell you what I want my day to look like. But where’s the fun in that? So here goes…

How early I wake up depends on the season, what we have to accomplish and how late I stayed up the night before! I take an hour by myself to prepare for the day. I sit in a quiet place reserved for listening.  It is worthwhile for me to hear from God before I hear from all the people in my house.

I cook breakfast while the kids get moving, have their own quiet times and feed the animals. If the chickens are laying, we eat eggs.  If my farmer friend has killed a pig, we eat sausage.  My mom cleans the kitchen while the kids and I gather around the table to start school. And YES! I do realize how awesome this is!  

This year we are studying the Old Testament and American History together.  I read aloud for these two subjects and the ensuing conversation can last until lunch if the topics are intriguing.  Looking back, I treasure the foundation that reading aloud has established for our family interaction. The kids draw, paint, knit, sculpt clay or work on our timeline while listening.

After we break for lunch, I cover the basics like math, science and grammar with the younger three.  My 10^th grader does the bulk of his work independently.  We write and give oral reports as part of a very small co-op. We have a list of assignments and indoor chores to check off. But I will admit that more often than not, if the weather is inviting, we escape outdoors before indoor tasks are done. When it’s planting time, we are learning in the dirt. Harvest time? Well that’s health and nutrition, as we can homemade salsa and make our own natural medicines for winter colds. 

  

I've shared the basic framework of our homeschool days.  But what I really want to leave you with is this: Don't be afraid to change your schedule to let real life in. No book assignment will ever be as important as a conversation with your child about hurt feelings or his dreams for the future.  If you fill the day with busyness, there won't be time for questions. And by all means, don't judge the day's worth by comparing your day to someone else's.  The earth looks different according to the seasons, and I think our lives should too. 

Simply Family

Our first night in this farmhouse was spent with 6 of us trying to pile onto one air mattress.  We tried to make the most of what we had until the next day when the furniture arrived. Jett woke up crying for Georgia, which made me cry. We didn't have anything to drink and there weren't enough blankets.  But the next morning as the sun rose on our little farm, snow flakes fell like soft reminders that our time with one another is a gift. This was a dream! Unfortunately, there was no outerwear in our dream. 
 

So out I went to buy boots and bread, mittens and milk, and of course the one ugly Christmas tree that's your only option when you're right up against the 25th.   It wasn't until after the snow melted and we had to start scrubbing the toilets that we realized this wasn't a cabin vacation. 

 

Life got simple fast. There's no where to shop around here unless you are looking for fresh eggs or local honey.  And if you want to get out of the house, you go play in the woods, or shovel manure in the barn. Fast food means a lunch the kids can fix for themselves. And date night might mean packing a basket and driving the golf cart over to a neighboring farm. 

My point is that we are home. Alot. We are together. Alot. And the result is we love each other more and more every day. My kids are best friends and they depend on each other.  I think this is normal. They can't wait to finish their school work and build a fort or ride bikes or shoot arrows...with each other!  I don't run to this lesson and that meeting, doing things I used to think I had to do. We don't even take many field trips. We are living the field trip!

My idea of simplifying is saying no to things that swallow up my time so I can fill those precious moments with learning and growing and loving the people around me. I just can't allow the urgent to crowd out the important.  I'm making it my life mission to spend my time with my family first. Time is so limited. I want to treat it like the treasure that it is.

So what do we do all day? I'll tell you that in my next post.

Rumaging Through Memories

This smell makes me wish I was 10 years younger. Then I would start all over and have more babies....It's 1am and I am cleaning out the basement. I have come across some treasures that I forgot I had. Here is the welcome sign my mom had made for the day we brought PJ home from China. It reads, "Welcome Home China's Fairest Treasure-Promise Joy." Wow, that takes me back. Next I found a tiny pink sleeper that belonged to Dove. When I put it to my face, I could smell that sweet baby smell. I know I am tired, but that smell brought tears to my eyes. Wasn't it just yesterday we were laying Dovie under the bililamp. She was the yellow baby. Next there are pictures I had made holding Jett when he was 6 weeks old. How I wish I had done that with all the kids. At the bottom of the box was something broken that I thought I had thrown away. Underneath newborn socks and ugly outfits I used to dress Noah in, was a bunny that played Brahms Lullaby. The week I found out I was pregnant, I bought that bunny and played it throughout my first pregnancy. I really cried when I held on to that! How can that baby be almost 13 years old?

I sit on the basement floor with these treasures in my lap and think through the stages of my life. How blessed I am. Events and memories flood my thoughts so quickly I try to stop and rewind. I want to remember certain things forever. I capture each one to decorate the ethereal walls in these rooms of memory. Quickly my mind flashes back past one, two, three, four children to the beginning of family. And there before it all is what is still here 18 years later...Danny. Ah, none of this would be what it is had I joined forces with anyone else. Now thoughts turn to prayers, petitions. "OH GOD! Please please please. Guide the path of each of my children. Light the way that leads them to a relationship like the one I have." None of the memories I am playing over in my head would exist had I not married a man who cherishes his family. I get to stay home because he values the role of motherhood. I get to homeschool because he supports me. I am free to make home a full time job because he does what he can to enable me to be here.

Yes, I am blessed! And I will cherish what I have today.

Our Separate Shells

We sat under a tent by the ocean. I read by lantern light while she listened. I in my oyster bed, mom in her argonauta. Each in different shells of life, we connect with the wisdom offered in this tiny book written nearly 60 years ago. Lindbergh takes us through the phases of our life's relationships. I get a glimpse of the future in her life; she can remember the past through mine.

I want to expound on what I've read. But I before I do, take a look at this portion. It reminds me of recent nights on the beach reading and talking with my mom. It calls me to pay attention to the need in me to relax.

page 94..."Evening is the time for conversation. Morning is for mental work, I feel, the habit of school-days persisting in me. Afternoon is for physical tasks, the out-of-doors jobs. But evening is for sharing, for communication. Is it the uninterrupted dark expanse of the night after the bright segmented day that frees us to each other?

Communication - but not for too long. Because good communication is stimulating like black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. Before we sleep we go out again into the night. We walk up the beach under the stars. And we when tire of walking, we lie flat on the sand under a bowl of stars. We feel stretched, expanded to take in their compass. They pour into us until we are filled with the stars, up to the brim.

This is what one thirsts for, I realize, after the smallness of the day, of work, of details, of intimacy - even of communication, one thirsts for the magnitude and universality of a night full of stars, pouring into one like a fresh tide. "

This selection touches on something I recently read by Susan Schaeffer Macaulay. She was talking about how, as mothers, we need to focus on winding down in the evening hours, facilitating an environment in which our family can relax at the end of the day. She acknowledges how difficult this can be, especially for a mother who is with her children at home all day. Yet endless busyness will inevitably lead to the fragmentation of our souls. So what do we do? I have a couple of ideas I want to try and see how the mood in my home might change. Retreat is something Lindbergh stresses. I'll share more in my next post.

Build Strong Children

It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men. ~Frederick Douglass

I am on a hotel balcony looking into the room where two of my children play. I recall this quote twittered today by a friend. It is surreal to watch my family doing life on the other side of glass. I have written about this before...watching my family through a window. I cannot hear what is being said. The dynamic changes when one of my senses is disengaged. What I see is magnified. The smiles, the silent laughter, the eye contact between a brother and a sister.

Tonight Promise has agreed to Jett's request to play. She has chosen a theme he loves: Batman. She has drawn the Joker on a pizza box top and dressed Jett in his favorite Batman costume. Jett watches PJ intently as she explains the rules, which simply are...punch Joker. Why are they are having such fun together? Because one has chosen selflessly to play what the other likes.

Love really is an easy choice. It's not necessary that we always be doing something that is centered around self. Why don't we as parents teach our children to love, give and share on the front side of life? Wouldn't we be setting them up for success as adults? It's not as impossible as culture tells us. If we listen to the loudest voices around us, we hear, "children are a hassle", "motherhood is a burden - certainly not a career choice worth pursuing." But if you were to step out of range of that voice, even momentarily, your ears would ring with the song of the family (borrowed from The Pearl). Listen intently to the Mother Heart within you, and you will question culture. Allow your ear to be drawn and you will pursue something above the status quo. You will not pursue in vain!

National Apron Day

Yesterday was national 'Wear Your Apron Day'. You know I love any opportunity to wear an apron. This was our opp to wear one out in public! My family gave me this lovely frock for Mother's Day. My girls and I had fun wearing our aprons running errands, going to piano lessons, even taking Noah to Boy Scouts.

What I really love is the opportunity to share something of a simpler life with my kids. I think it's cool that my girls are more conscious of aprons than Hannah Montana!

Mother's Day

I don’t think I have ever left a store crying before. I love shopping! Saturday I stopped by a local gift shop to pick out a gift for my mother-in-law. When I walked in, one lady said to the other, “This is the mother of the family that was in here so long the other day.” I knew Danny had taken the kids Mother’s Day shopping and I wondered if Jett had come in there and done something ‘memorable.’ But as they began to tell me their impressions of my family, I felt like the luckiest woman alive.

Without a doubt Mother’s Day is my favorite day of the year. I enjoy the big deal the kids make, the gifts my family gives me and that we go out for lunch somewhere nice. I love that I always spend Mother’s Day with my precious mom who inspired me to pour myself into my family.

This year was no exception. They lavished me with beautiful gifts and hugs and homemade art. We dined on fancy salads and cheesecake while sitting outside by a fountain. But nothing could have made the occasion more meaningful than what I heard those women saying about my husband and children. “Tell us the story on your family.” “Everyone of your children is so precious.” “Your husband was so attentive to each one of them as they shopped for you.” “That man, oh my goodness!” On and on it went as my eyes brimmed with tears of gratitude.

They continued…“Seeing them just made our day.” “We talked about them all day long.” But the one that really got me was….“We know so many rich people, families with plenty of money, but when your family walked out of here I said, ‘That is the kind of family I want to have’.”

Those women don’t know anything about us. They have no idea how we have struggled financially this past year and that picking out gifts in a gift shop was such a treat. But their words were more treasured than gifts that came out of that shop wrapped in beautiful ribbons.

I love Mother’s Day. I feel like the busyness of the world stops for one day (at least my world does) and I get to revel in the fact that I am living a dream. I am surrounded by love. Genuine love. I get to be a wife and mother. Now I did not always think that was a goal worthy of aspiring to. I’ve tried my hand at a lot of things. But nothing has brought me the absolute joy that loving my family brings. The older I get, the more I learn about aspirations.

When I was a kid, my mom tirelessly and patiently raised us to love Jesus and love others. Quietly her example poured into me day after day. As I grew older, the voice of the world grew louder than hers. “Do this. Do that. You have to make a name for yourself. “ All along my mom’s name was just “Mom.” And that is what I came back to!

Happiness Party

Dovie likes to throw Happiness Parties. When asked what it is, she replies, "A party to celebrate my happiness!" How do you like that? Dovie is surely the happiest kid I know. Her spirit is such a reminder to us to be happy wherever we find ourselves. She adorns the walls with her handmade decorations and constructs a kid-friendly snack menu. Tomorrow she has one such party planned because she knows Danny will be home all day. I have been commissioned to bake brownies for the event. I hope Dovie is always this happy-go-lucky! Thought I'd share this idea in case you need to spread a little cheer this week!

It's So Simple

Is it easier to trust God when you live simply? I would be willing to bet it is.

Last week I was enjoying the afternoon at the Laurel Ridge Farms. All the kids were occupied and I found myself alone. If I stood where the sun was shining, I could forget that it was freezing cold two steps to the left in the shade. I made a point to close my eyes, turn my head up and enjoy that moment. God quietly whispered, "You can always live like this if you want. You can find the sunny spot and step into it." He brought this picture to mind that you see here. This is my friend's apartment in China. For a week last summer, I helped her with her toddler and new baby. It was so simple. I did laundry on the balcony! Can you see the washer in the picture? Her dryer was on another balcony. When I stepped out there, I could see lots of other people doing life. It was easy to stand there and pray for the city as I observed people doing their own laundry, feeding babies, exercising, watching tv. I walked to the market alone and took in the sights around me. For a week I didn't think about anything stressful. Why bother? My problems and worries where on the other side of the world! (No, I am not talking about my family!) The following week I worked in the orphanage with Danny and Noah: get up, walk to work, play with kids, eat dinner, spend time with friends, go to sleep. It was simple and it was beautiful. Other than my annual silent retreats, I have never experienced that kind of mental rest.

So, I am soaking up the sun and the simple moment and God says, "Remember the simplicity you love and miss about being in China? I offer that here, but you don't seem interested." How do you expect me to recreate that? I ask. "Live in today," He says. "Remember Jesus' words in Matthew 6 that no one seems to take seriously? But seek ye first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

"Focus on something else...MY kingdom. Not yours." God is saying. "Stop focusing on what you don't have. Stop trying to figure out solutions for tomorrow's unknown. Live in today. Be present in the lives of the people I have put in front of you. Don't squander these precious things about today (kid produced puppet shows, endless questions, doing your laundry indoors). If you can grasp the beauty in that, and fully engage in today, you will understand what I mean in Matthew 6." Sounds pretty simple, doesn't it?

Happy 2009

Making lists I will loose. Reading four totally different books at the same time. Deciding at 10pm to paint a room. These are a few of my favorite things. I call myself unorganized. Beth calls me a dabbler. I like that. I have embraced that persona ever since it reached my ears. "Yes," I thought, "I am a dabbler!" Sure sounds better than starter of many projects, finisher of few. But what do you do when you love eclectic and modern? Clutter and cleanliness? Quilting over vacuuming? Heck, I can't even pick a favorite color and stick to it!

In 2009 this dabbler will try to hone in on a few choice resolutions. Of course, I cannot tell you what they are. I would then be accountable for my actions and called on the carpet for dabbling. Mitzi, I am hoping you are reading this and formulating a plan of action for my inconsistent behavior!!

Last night we had s0me friends over for New Year's Eve. We each wrote down something we hope to see God do in 2009. My intent is that the person taking home a request will pray for that individual throughout the coming year. Even though I knew I was going to spring this on our guests, I had a hard time figuring out what I would write on my own 3x5 card. "But of course," you are saying..."you can't even figure out what book you want to read this month!" And you are right. I want to see God do so many things that I cannot seem to narrow it down to just one request. I've been in my pajamas all day, so I have taken some time to reflect on '08 and ponder '09. Here is what I came up with. So, if you happened to have drawn my card last night, you got alot more to pray about!

I want to speak positively about myself and to my children and husband.
Encourage our children to develop their own daily Bible reading habit.
Organize my time, our house and our homeschool day.
Recognize the needs of others and respond like Christ.
I want to pray with passion, believing the One who listens will act.
Consciously put myself in a position to hear God daily.

When I inventory my life, these are things that are important to me. But I am compelled to ask God to narrow my focus, show me what He wants for me this year. I don't think He expects me to do all these things perfectly just because it is a brand new year at my spot on the globe. He wants more for me than I even want for myself. God knows what's coming in 2009. So I want Him to turn my attention; make His concerns my concerns . May I remember to get up each morning and say, “Here is a brand new day, a blank page. God, what do you want me to do with it?"

The 12 Days of Christmas

Today is the third day of Christmas. Traditionally, the 12 days of Christmas begins on December 26th with the Feast of Stephen (a day to commemorate the martyrdom of Stephen). The season ends on January 6th with Epiphany or Three Kings Day. That is why some people keep their decorations up after New Year's Day.

Our family enjoys acknowledging this tradition for several reasons. For one, we are easing our way out of Christmas instead of rejoining the rat race the day after Christmas. This is when we make cookies, finish craft projects we intended to give as gifts, play games and watch movies together, stay in our pajamas for a couple days. It is another opportunity to focus on Christ with scripture readings about His revelation to all people. Most of the Advent scripture reading focuses on Jesus fulfilling Jewish prophecy. Epiphany is the celebration of God revealing Himself to the Gentiles as commemorated by the Kings from the East acknowledging the lordship of Jesus.

So, feel free to leave up your decorations, ponder the significance of Christ's birth a little longer and keep eating Christmas cookies. You have 9 more days!

The Angel's Candle

I am running behind on these Advent posts. But I generally don't have my thoughts formulated til after we have reflected on the week's readings. Week three focuses on the announcements made by the angels. There was the announcement of the end of infertility to Zechariah, the glorious one to Mary, the reassuring one to Joseph and of course the multitude of angels appearing to the shepherds. There's a really great perspective on Zechariah in Watch For the Light. It's the December 13th reading, written by Karl Barth.

Our family discussion this week centered around how our lives announce Christ to the people around us. We are the hands and feet of Jesus to each other, to the children in need with whom we shared our gifts with this year, and everybody inbetween. We reminded each other that we even announce Christ to those we don't know who observe how we treat each other in public. Do we show kindness in our speech and actions? Are we helpful to one another or annoyed by interruptions?

My hope is that we are loving and patient. My desire is that we will portray family life as the treasure it is. May the end result be our tiny group of six announcing to the world that the love of Christ is a tangible thing.

Christmas Fun

It seems Dove is the only one willing to trudge through the mud and cold. Today she had a horse back riding lesson. None of the other kids wanted to go with us. So we made a day of it. After the horse fun, she rinsed the hoof cleaning grim off her hands and we stopped at the outlet mall. Apparently Dovie is as spur of the moment as I am. She wanted to get her ears pierced. So we did! Can you see her sparkly addition?


Then Pottery Barn made my day with this clearance West Elm silver tree. Yahoo! Now I have to figure out how to make the felted wool ornaments I saw in Holiday Crafts 2008.

Look at sweet Jett in this polar bear sweater and hat duo! Couldn't resist bringing this home for him. He loves new clothes as much as his Poppy.

Enter Advent

Advent - preparing for the coming of Christ. This is a simple way to introduce family time into your home.

It's Snowing

All that talk last night about needing fake snow and what do I wake up to today? Snow! Big chunks are actually falling. The kids are freaking out. But it probably won't stick. However, when we see flurries in Georgia, everything shuts down. So this should be a fun day.

O Christmas Tree

I usually don't wait this late in the season to put up our Christmas tree. But having a real tree means I have to wait til Pikes starts blowing the fake snow. Here we are with our tree. It's the one to the right. I love going to Pikes during the Christmas season. All those trees crammed into the greenhouse! Ah, the smell is divine. It is my favorite earthy smell. Ranks right above horse manure. Yeah, I know it's poop. But I love the smell of being on a farm.

Anyway, I enjoy wandering through the mass of trees, checking all sides of each flocked tree before we pick one. The kids like meandering through the rows and rows of trees. The boy working that day really wanted us to just pick a tree. I really wanted him to leave us alone. Finally we all agreed we had chosen the perfect tree. But we couldn't take it home because of the rain. The fake snow would fall off. Since that is all the snow we are likely to get in Georgia, I don't want to mess it up. We left without our tree. It was sad. Like picking out a puppy at the pound only to find out you can't take him home til he gets his shots. Yeah, I know I take this a little too seriously. But it's fun. And since I get to be the mom, there are a few things I take the liberty of being a little nutty about...like riding the Pink Pig, driving around to look at Christmas lights, watching all the old Christmas movies and, yes, the smell of horse poop.

Hope your Christmas season is off to a fun start!

Back in the Saddle

This is Laurel Ridge Farms and one of the many reasons I love homeschooling! Today the kids and I loaded up the car and Noah read our history lesson as we drove to the country. Dovie had a horseback riding lesson with Rebecca. This was a birthday gift from her grandparents. She has waited a year and a half to do this. Dovie loves Rebecca, the owner and her instructor at Laurel Ridge Farms. Before the lesson was over, the farrier made a house call. It was akin to Little House on the Prairie as he lifted open the sides of his trailer and set out his anvil. We had a chance to learn something unique as he worked the horses' hooves. It was a great day.