Friday, December 05, 2008
Fear or Love
I have been pondering this post from Candy since the day I first read it. Take a look at it. It is worth the read. I couldn't get past the thought that someone needs to hear that I am not afraid of their addictions, their struggles, their issues. My brother, who is in prison because of addiction, has struggles and issues and no one to listen. I have been afraid of these things. Afraid I won't have answers for him, afraid I will blame myself for not looking after him better when we were young, afraid that I can't fix him. I am afraid of his pain. Looking back at those sentences, I see how many times I say "I." But those things aren't mine to carry. And his story is not about me. Only the scarred hands of Jesus are equipped to hold that stuff. I am just supposed to be the love. That is it. Love. So I can remain immobilized by my fear or I can reach out to him right smack in the middle of his.
How many people cross our path waiting for us to love them? If we don't love, they might look for someone else. But what if they don't look? What if they give up? Let's be a part of the movement! Who do you need to love?
This poem is by George MacDonald:
I said, Let me walk in the field;
God said, No, walk in the town;
I said, There are no flowers there;
He said, No flowers but a crown.
I said, But the sky is black,
There is nothing but noise and din;
But he wept as he sent me back,
There is more, he said, there is sin.
I said, But the air is thick,
And smog is veiling the sun;
He answered, Yet souls are sick,
And your work is yet undone.
I said, I will miss the light,
And friends will miss me, they say;
He answered me, Choose tonight,
If I am to miss you, or they.
I pleaded for time to be given;
He said, Is it hard to decide?
It will not seem hard in Heaven
To have followed the steps of your Guide.
I cast one look at the field,
Then set my face to the town;
He said, My child do you yield?
Will you leave the flowers for the crown?
Then into His hand went mine,
And into my heart came He;
And I walk in a light Divine,
The path I had feared to see.