"It's not God's fault," he said with a laugh that was sincere as anything I've heard him say. David happened to call the night I had gotten the letter and artwork. I was a heap of emotion. "How can you not be mad at the God who allowed this to happen? He didn't stop it," I say feeling a lump rise in my throat. To which David answered, "I can’t explain it. But if I am going to be angry for this, I would have to be angry at God for all the children starving in the world. God didn't do it. Anyway, that is what people who don’t believe say." I had to laugh. He’s right.
David continued, "That’s not what concerns me. I want to know the reason I am still alive when I didn't want to be. I’ve got to learn how to stop the cycle. Every time a tough thing happens to me, I do the same thing. I want to grow up." You are wondering how I have such an impeccable memory? I took notes. He started saying this stuff and I grabbed my notebook.
How does this happen? Why is the victim able to view this more rationally than the observer? I would propose that it is the work of the Holy Spirit. There is so much action happening just beyond our sight – a world of energy, healing and strength. We get so wrapped up in our temporal responsibilities that we sometimes forget the spiritual realm, the undercurrent of our lives.
God gives strength as need arises. Look closely at Isaiah 43:2:
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.”
We are going to walk through junk, struggle through some pretty deep waters. It might splash in our face and cause us to choke, but it will not fill our lungs and steal our life. God is not going to let it overtake us. God knew David was going to need a lot more grace than the average joe to handle what is coming to his mind these days. And I can’t explain it to you any other way. That is not my job anyway! My job, my joy today is to praise the Wonderful Counselor who is holding David’s head above the current. I am witnessing a healing for which I have petitioned God for 20 years. I am grateful that God gives grace as it’s needed.